Scrambled Brains

He's just a child really

I never read the Tin Drum but I did see the film. The story is about a boy who decides to stop growing up at the age of 11. It’s the kind of magical realism that appeals to me.

Feels like me in a way. I was full of confidence in the primary school, but when I got to the comprehensive I felt quite overwhelmed. The age range of 11-18 is too great in my opinion and in the opinion of many others. 

As a young 11 year old I was certainly not ready. I felt I had to stop with Lego and playing and things, and friends already were getting girlfriends when in fact we all knew girls were just silly.

They’re just trying to be like the older kids. 

I was always very uncomfortable at being cool and adult. It’s just not my thing. 

I’m a geek (nerds are academic geeks) and into fun things. Shit at sport (though I’d have given anything to have been good at football) so thank god Dungeons and Dragons was a thing when we were teenagers.

I like playing. I like music. I still like all the stuff I did when I was 13. 

It took some growing up for me to realise at 40 that I still did, and should rediscover them. 

This has happened top many of us and was one of the better things to come out of lockdown - rediscovering old hobbies that made us happy.

I still feel a bit conscious of the fact that if I go to a cafe or pub to prep a game that I’m being judged by the cover of the book I’m reading.

They did adult covers of the Harry Potter books for this reason.

Stonemasonry: it got him noticed!

When I was 22 and living in London, I gave up the yoke of trying to get a career in advertising and ended up applying for any job I could.

Degrees from art colleges are not particularly helpful in this regard.

It says here you're really methodical and ordered; you are good with personal admin and like be on top of it. But over here it says you went to art college, you like fine art and also role-playing games...?

You can't be this and that. It doesn't compute. No one will understand you. Do you see?

You need to pigeonhole yourself, so you can sell yourself as an understandable commodity.

But I'm a human being. We're contradictory. Complex. Why can't I be the two?

Looks at me funny. 

Does not compute...does not compute...

I ran out and heard a small explosion behind me.

Years later at a party I met a real Sloane Ranger (remember them) and she was a character. A head-hunter and a former seller of Socialist Worker. 

I loved the contradiction already.

She told me every CV she received was identical. Straight As at GCSE and A-level, Duke of Edinburgh Gold badge, Russell Group Uni - but nothing to mark out the individual. 

I gave my former step-sons experience with stonemasonry work. This proved to be a talking point when they were interviewed.

Sounds like the return of the individual is a thing, and definitely something to be celebrated.

Why so many gamers are neurodiverse

Tabletop role-playing games (TTRPGs) are my mind-expanding drugs of choice. I've thought recently why those of us who are different are so drawn to them.

• Fuels the child's imagination state education does its best to extinguish
• Establishes a world or worlds with rules that you are cognisant of, unlike the everyday world where social rules are often nuanced and baffling.
• Gives you an equal voice to everyone else - you are heard. And you have leverage.
• Where you are in collaboration with others for a common goal, as opposed to individually competitive,  Machiavellian, combatative, undermined.
• Feelings of achievement, highs and lows. Glory. 

My pink half of the drainpipe

Due to boundary issues, our lawn has ended up with a Brazilian.

I'll aim for the full Hollywood next time.

As you were.